Legendary Florida Road Trip '09: Part I ...

Every picture tells a story ... but some of those stories become slightly more awesome with a little literary license.* In that vein, I've selected a few random un-photoshopped wonders from Legendary Florida Road Trip '09 to share with a (hopefully) welcoming world:

(1) So I said to Bonnie, "how great would it be to get our picture taken in front of this ancient Mayan temple (conveniently located in the exact spot that would later become the Epcot center world tour)?" She agreed and up the stairs we went.

But what I didn't tell her was that I really just wanted to re-enact the ancient Mayan tradition of sacrificing the most senior member of a road trip to the largest male member of that road trip ... tee hee hee ...

(2) One of the most amazing things about road trips is you get to learn SO MUCH about the people you're traveling with. For instance, here we learned about Janelle's long-lost childhood dream of being an astronaut ... and about Deana's undying hatred for all things "NASA."

All I can say is, Neil Armstrong better watch out ... after all, you should have seen what Deana did to the life-size statue of Buzz Lightyear ...

(3) Now, by all appearances, this picture looks fairly normal ... a NY-hearting Matt, a camera-clad Bonnie, a sausage-and-sourkraut-filled Deana, and a root-beer swizzling Janelle. But look closer. Four glasses in the picture ... three filled with sweet, sugary nectar (otherwise known as Root Beer) ... but one is COMPLETELY EMPTY. Turns out Bonnie is quite the drinker, especially when you get her in an all-you-can-drink German Restaurant.

How many drinks did she have over the course of our trip? Ich nur Bahnhof verstehen!

(4) So you're probably all thinking, "I could have sworn he said all these pictures where 'un-photoshopped' ... I mean, he even made up a word to get that point across."

Ahhhh, but what you don't realize is that this ISN'T photoshopped ... as part of our magical visit to Florida, we all had a lovely visit to the "Sorcerer's Apprentice Do-It-Yourself Plastic Surgeon Cartoon Face Factory" (patent pending). During the visit, one of the nice trinket-selling attendants invited us to try on a new face for the day. As the attendant told us, "[h]ere in Theme Park World, we strive to give every visitor a slap-happy glance into the wacky world of Disney ... go ahead and go crazy!"

Looking back now, I think it may be an improvement.

(5) Not much to add here ... as far as I can tell, it's just three happy people enjoying the endearing magic of a runaway East Coast road trip.

Two points for randomness!

* NOTE 1: Most of this is true ... but literary license, after all, presupposes a certain amount of falsity, no?