Genie in a Jug: A Practical Alternative to Radar?

While evaluating whether a court should take judicial notice of the accuracy of radar in detecting speed in 1959, Judge Ruark of the Missouri Court of Appeals had this to say:

"Whether the radar device is an instrument applying known laws of science, or whether it is a genie in a jug, emitting evil emanations, makes no difference; the important thing is that it works."

Of course, Judge Ruark's brilliant quote begs an important social question: Why has the law enforcement community ignored the enormous potential of the "Genie in a Jug" speed-detection method? After all, troopers around the country have known about this important tool for decades (ever since Officer Van Laddaman of the Vermont State Troopers first employed the technology to pull over speeding semi-trucks in the early 1950s). Some have argued that the conscious disregard of this vital technology may simply be another form of religious intolerance in a country that professes acceptance of all creeds.

After all, we all know that "Genies" first gained prominence as part of their important role in the Islamic religious tradition. The Genie, or Jinn, is a supernatural fiery creature which possesses free will (mentioned in the Qur'an where an entire Sura is named after them (Al-Jinn)). Analysts suggest that the decision not to use Genies to enforce speeding ordinances is a clear sign that this country does not accept Islam or those who practice it.


But I think the real answer is far less troubling. Clearly, there are vital reasons NOT to use the "Genie in a Jug" method: Namely, Genie's are often PURE EVIL (as, apparently, are the ones Judge Ruark proposes using). While some are good (see Aladdin) evil genies are said to lead humans astray. In fact, in Islam, Satan, known in Arabic as Iblis, is the iconic genie that refused to bow down to Adam when ordered to by Allah.

This nation simply cannot afford to let Genies shoot their "evil emanations" at its citizens merely to enforce speeding laws accurately. Clearly, the costs (humanity's destruction based on unchecked use of evil, mystical powers leading to some sort of Armageddon) far outweigh the benefits (more fines for speeding).

I say the time has come to put the "Genie in a Jug" argument to rest. After all, radar works ... and I for one will sleep better knowing a disgruntled trooper won't be able to use his speed-detection device to enslave the general populace.